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Queer Support Group

We are a Queer affirmative, social justice based Mental Health Organisation.

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Seeking help is an act of courage, an act of self-care and a desire to live more fully.

Aarathi Selvan-Founder Pause for Perspective

Our thoughts & stories!

Feeling Secure or Distant and Anxious? What’s happening in your relationship?

Feeling Secure or Distant and Anxious? What’s happening in your relationship? Social media has taken

Is newness the other side of grief?

Is newness the other side of grief? Our may newsletter speaks to the topic of newness. Newness

Experience of leisure

Experience of leisure I was looking forward to this break from work. I had a

On Instagram

pauseforperspective

Tell us! What sense are you making of this excerpt

Tell us! What sense are you making of this excerpt? We thought it was a nice discernment to ways in which to understand secure relationships

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Excerpted from the book Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non Monogamy by Jessica Fern.
#relationship #attachmenttheory #couples #pauseforperspective

ID: a person sitting at the edge of a cliff lookin

ID: a person sitting at the edge of a cliff looking down at a blue ocean. Words on the top left “is newness the other side of grief?”

Our may newsletter speaks to the topic of newness. Newness reminds me of new clothes, fresh delights, trepidation, and nervous happiness. Newness can also take the tonality of harshness sometimes. The feeling of being yanked out of what was comfortable, safe and unquestioned.

As I put together the voices of our fellows at Pause for Perspective’s fellowship program I think about the rude awakenings, yanking into new ways of living, looking for meaning in the face of a steadily spiraling dystopian world that I have been experiencing in the last two years of my life. Covid happened, it’s still happening in ways that we are yet to reckon with, I let go of several ties that connected me to the world I was familiar with for well over three decades, some intentionally and some just because life happens. Is grief the other side of newness? And inversely is newness the other side of grief? Do we hold these together as we live this life that is swelling with such pain and so much joy all at once?

Read the rest of this piece over at website. Link in bio.

#new #grief #pauseforperspective #mentalhealthispolitical

Are you feeling secure in your relationship becaus

Are you feeling secure in your relationship because of its structure or your actual relationship experience with your partner?

The fact that you are married, or in a monogamous or committed relationship is not going to sort a disagreement out. Fights and disagreements need to be resolved through deep listening, understanding and allowing yourself to be influenced by your partner. “Agree to disagree” in a relationship is just complacency. If you dont see your partners perspective, accommodate, challenge and also align yourself to a way of viewing the world that works for you both, then there is some work to do. Work like this is a life long process and we want to show up for it. If the structure of the relationship is invoking in you a fight, flight, freeze that you both are unable to come back from and are still in a relationship, then the structure is what is making you secure. If our self-worth, self-love and self-esteem is contingent solely on our partner being monogamously committed to us we’ve successfully subscribed to patriarchy and nothing more.

#relationshipgoals #relationship #couples #couplestherapy #pauseforperspective

Summer in the library Join Pause Library this su

Summer in the library

Join Pause Library this summer to experience a fully curated and led workshop series to immerse yourself in the library space.

What we hope for you to experience through this engagement:

Curiosity: Library spaces for both readers and non-readers can be a space of learning, fun and curiosity. Through activities, books and community we will become available to the plentiful curiosity present in our hearts.

Learning how the world is: the world is big, the world is diverse , the world is full of wondrous and dangerous meanings. Through books-picture books, chapter books, fictional books and nonfictional books we will learn the many ways in which we are located in the world. We’ll engage in activities, create our own ways of being in the world and write our own lives into being too!

Embrace diversity: Through books, through reading with each other and through activities in the space we will connect to the possibility of what it means to live among each other. We will get an opportunity to see diverse ways in which the world exists and connect to and embrace who we are and who our friends are.

Knowing, Understanding and Embracing Emotions: Emotions come. Emotions tell us so much about how we want to live in the world and what we are feeling. Through books, community and activities that we curate come to understand, express and enjoy the presence of emotions.

Friendships: So many of us long for meaningful friendships. Come read, learn and engage with a community that loves to nurture friendships of all kinds.

When: Monday to Friday
Time: 11am to 1pm
Who can join: Open for humans from age 9 to 80+ who would love to immerse and be held in library space
Who will conduct: Trained Mental health practitioners and library educators.
Where: At Pause Library in Pause for Perspective, Hyderabad
Limited to 8 people everyday.
Cost: Rs 3500/- for the month
Date: From 2nd May to 31st may
#library #bookstagram #summercamphyderabad #pauseforperspective

The wonders of me! An invitation for everyone to

The wonders of me!
An invitation for everyone to gather, read, listen, learn and embrace oneself.

Gather: We’ll gather with the Pause for Perspective community at the cafe Qaveh Khaneh, at Ashara Bookstore.

Read: we’ll bring picture books from Pause Library to read together, immerse and enjoy. These picture books will be on themes that we’ll focus weekly-self love, family, friendships and our emotions!

Listen: we’ll listen to stories of young people in the books and in our gathering. We’ll listen to ways in which people are an colors of the rainbow, divergent and Wth many hues. We’ll support, laugh and enjoy the ways we show up in the world.

Learn: we’ll learn about the ways in which we like to be, ways in which we can be and how we can connect with family friends and ourselves in ways that can provide joy and community.

Embrace: we’ll embrace the summer, the people in our lives and ourselves in ways that can help us be in the world and thrive in it.

Sunday at 4-6pm

Who: 9-14years and adults who love books and live to learn are welcome!

Themes for each week:
8th May: My emotions and me
15th May: Family and Me
22nd May: Friendships and me
29th May: Many ways of being me

Rs 4000/- per person for the entire camp.

#library #books #summercamphyderabad #summerafternoons #pauseforperspective

*Imagining Nonbinariness* -In the Body in the Worl

*Imagining Nonbinariness*
-In the Body in the World

In this workshop:

-we will *attempt to* locate nonbinariness.
-explore the historical and cultural understanding of this experience and identity
-we will delve into cultural understandings and lived experiences of nonbinariness
-We will explore gender and neurodivergence
-we will explore thriving and populate ways of the world that help us thrive
-we will journey into community nurturing.
-we will reimagine a non-binary world and design our "Favourite Selves"

Who is facilitating this workshop:

Meherin Roshanara

A Nonbinary, Queer and ND MHP, poet and conceptual artist who is seeking to explore collective imagination and the possibilities for community healing.

Aarathi Selvan
A Non-Binary, Queer and Neurodivergent MHP, supervisor and teacher who loves to create community and conversations wherever they go.

When
20th May 2022
Where
At Pause for Perspective, Begumpet
When
5:00pm to 7:00pm
How much:
Gift economy. Minimum Rs 500/-

Who can join:
Anyone exploring their gender identity.

#nonbinary #queer #love #mentalhealth #queermentalhealth #queerbodies #pauseforperspective

Image ID: mosaic background with paste colors on a

Image ID: mosaic background with paste colors on a poster which has a rainbow background. On the foreground is A mosaic image of a therapist facing forward and looking and smiling at the camera. Behind them is the couch on which people they consult with sit. Running in the Center of the poster are the words “thoughts from the couch” on a vertical plan background.

The hope is to capture what therapists at pause are sitting with and wondering and hoping to make visible about therapy, human experiences, people and relationships.

In radically accepting who you are as a person, in accepting the way you think, the way you feel in the right now you offer yourself an opportunity to observe. Observe the reality of your life and how you are responding to the world.

For instance, if you feel conflicted about a relationship-feeling both drawn vs heartbroken by a persons halfass effort in your life. Radically accepting how you are feeling-a certain helplessness because you love deeply (often the strength of this seems a lot more than disappointment at another’s half ass effort) allows us to notice how it is that we love. Perhaps it gives us information about our patience, our care for honest conversations and our empathy. It also give us the freedom to respond. Does someone with a deep capacity for love, empathy and desire for honest conversation deserve to be constantly thwarted in possibilities of engagement? We begin to ask ourselves honest questions of our deserving, we choose what resonates and we form community.

Some of what therapy offers is this: The exercise in being on your side. Observe how you are and ways in which you respond. We walk then into ways of joy and how to open into it.
#radicalacceptance #beingonyourside #pauseforperspective #mindfulness #mentahealthmayters #therapistsofinstagram

Mindfulness session two. The obstacles to mindfuln

Mindfulness session two. The obstacles to mindfulness is the many ways our world tells us what we ought to do to survive.

Thank you @shravni11 for this beautiful poem. We feel inspired to come to the practice in all ways that open my heart out to me and my community.
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#mindfulness #pauseforperspective

Image ID: white poster with a blurred image of two

Image ID: white poster with a blurred image of two people embracing each other with a plaster on their mouths.

The Futile Analysis

My heart aches and I don't know what to do
It aches when it sees the patriarchy engulfed man screaming in his anger
Controling what patriarchy taught him to be an inferior human than him
It aches when I see the disregard and the disrespect for life
It aches at my own mistakes at my own unconscious or subconscious oppression
It aches at the wrongness and rightness
At the discrimination and divide
It aches when all the illusions fall apart
And you see the mirror
That is the world
That reflects to you, your own shadows
It aches at the futility of all of this analysis
When the choice I'm still making seems to be to keep quiet
When oppression shows up in my own home.
-@nidamir23

#poetry #oppression #patriarchy #resistance #protest #pauseforperspective

Mindfulness Based Interventions are westernised, i

Mindfulness Based Interventions are westernised, individualised and psychologised practices that have entered a white/Brahminical capitalist, patriarchal system catering to “fixing” bodies in order to fit the system.

The second generation mindfulness based interventions protest these ways of being and help access Mindfulness that is embedded in anti oppressive work.

We begin our nth batch of MBSM program at Pause this Saturday and the reflections here have been rich. Take a look at some of the things we explored. Thankyou @nidamir23 and @kalyani14 and the current group of MBSM participants for these thought provoking wonderments.

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#mindfulness #ethics #intention #presentmoment #antioppressivepractice #embodiment #mentalhealthsupport

Summer camp alert: Theda hai par mera hai: embraci

Summer camp alert: Theda hai par mera hai: embracing who I am. A personality development workshop for teens
Age: 10-13: 11am to 1pm
Age: 14-17: 2pm to 4pm

Inperson @ pause for perspective
Early bird : ₹4000 till April 18th
Post April 18th registration is ₹5000/-
Starting May 3rd
Every Tuesday and Friday
Seats limited to 10 young people

Our intention

We hope that summers in a world where covid has relented is one to reckon with again. In times like this, where the world has been rankled with covid and wars, isolation and fear, young people need spaces of solidarity, reflection and support. We invite young people who would enjoy coming back out slowly into the world to join us for a deeply interesting, fun and reflective workshop.

What we’ll do:
Young people will learn about embracing themselves, understanding and learning to make space for different emotions and building strong and resilient relationships with themselves and others.

How well do it:
Explorations will entail reading together from our library shelves, discussions, movie screenings, critical reflections, journaling, painting and reflective activities.

Tools we’ll use:
The program pulls together several tools of psychology including mindfulness, positive psychology, narrative practices and neuroscience.

Who will do it:

The program is led by our in house team of Counseling psychologists who work with children and young people. They are Counseling psychologists with additional certifications in mindfulness and narrative practices.

Call or WhatsApp: +91 81068 64001 to register

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#summercampehyderabad #summercamp #summercampforteens #summercampforkids #mentalhealth #personalitydevelopment #mindfulnessforkids

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In continuation to the previous post, we reflect h

In continuation to the previous post, we reflect here on what conscious partnership can look like.

Excerpted from an article for TOI.

What thoughts might you have around these questions?

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#relationshipgoals #couplescounseling #love #identity #pauseforperspective

Part 1. @aarathiselvan did an interview for Times

Part 1. @aarathiselvan did an interview for Times of India, a while ago on relationships and social parameters. Here are excerpts of the same.

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#relationshipgoals #relationship #socialidentity #truematch

Believe experience over expert Our bodies are on

Some of us do wonder if happiness is an experience

Some of us do wonder if happiness is an experience we’ve had at all..if it was ours and ours own. During my first therapy engagement at the age of 21, my presenting problem was “I don’t know what I like and if i like something because I was told that it would give me happiness” that began a journey of exploring things I do like, things that make me happy…my therapist called out things like “what is your favourite food, what is your hobby, who do you like most…” and so on and I wasn’t sure if my answers were scripted or that i genuinely liked these things because *I* liked them. She asked me then, “what icecream do you like?” …I hesitated there too… then I said tentatively that I probably like mint chocolate chip more for me than for the experiencing of having it with my sibling. And that, I know this because my body feels alive when I eat it. That was my clue into listening more to my body.

I’m not sure we all know what makes us happy …for us. For some of us it may be simple…in all like likelihood though..I wish your happiness is authentic and not a masked version of adaptation. Not one that is so because it works for all and sundry..but that it works for you.

ID: White poster with rainbow background. Words..What if "I am happy"
as an affirmation could be
I WISH MY HAPPINESS TO BE AUTHENTIC NOT A MASKED VERSION OF ADAPTION.
#neurodivergent #pauseforperspective #mentalhealth #happiness #now

Mindfulness care circle is an invitation to a spac

Mindfulness care circle is an invitation to a space where you can care for your body, know your body , learn from your body ways of the world this body of yours prefers and choose then ways that honor your body and heart. In a world that is fast depriving us of our voices, embodied practices can allow room for us to really listen and truly practice in anti oppression. Mindfulness Care Circle is led by mental health practitioners who are in MBSM teacher training program. 4:00pm-5:30pm. Rs 200 Per session Zoom

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#mbsm #mindfulness #pauseforperspective #mentalhealth #embodiedactivism #puse #bodyawareness

Events in march at Pause: Neurodivergent Support

Events in march at Pause:
Neurodivergent Support Group 9th and 23rd march from 5:00 to 6:30 pm Rs 200/- per session zoom
Mindfulness Care Circle on 12th and 26th march from 4:00-5:30. Rs 200 Per session Zoom
Queer Support Group 12th march and 26th march from 5:00pm to 7:00pm Rs 100 per session Zoom April 9th and 23rd
Safe Spaces and Quiet Reading Nooks on 18th march 5-6:30pm Fee 300/- In person session
Eight session MBSM plus Retreat. Starting 9th April-18th June Every Saturday at 10.30am to12.30pm Zoom & In Person Rs9000/- including classes, materials and our Self Help Journal called "My Mindful Moments"
Pfp Radio every Thursday from 9:00pm to 9:30pm Insta Live Free.
To register for any of these groups please DM or call on 8106864001

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While red and green flags have been useful for som

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